Breathe Magazine

I’ve had the same best friend since first grade, Cindy. She still remembers the day she met me and how she went home to tell her mom there was a girl at school with orange hair (apparently she’d never seen a red head before!). We still laugh about it.

Cindy and Monica in third grade

Cindy and I just clicked and for some reason she “gets” me more than anyone else does.

But, Cindy and I chose very different paths in life and there was a time when our friendship could have been forgotten. During high school she got pregnant and had to transfer schools. This put a wedge between us, but we remained close.

Then, I went to college and she had more babies… I always wanted us to stay close, but I have to admit I was resentful of her. There were times when I needed her, but she wasn’t there. I know it sounds selfish, but I was 18 years old and a pretty typical teenager in this regard.

I remember one particular day when I just broke up with my first love and Cindy was in the hospital giving birth to her second son. There was no one else I wanted to talk to but her, but I couldn’t. The details of both of our situations were not completely in our control, I realize that. You don’t get to choose when your heart gets broken or your baby decides to enter the world. The timing just sucked.

During this time we went through phases of not talking as much, but every time we caught up it was like no time had passed at all.

Cindy and Monica on a road trip last year

As I finished college and she raised babies we could have stopped talking and grown distant. We have two completely opposite lives and now we even live 3,000 miles apart!  You would think we would have remained cordial, but became strangers. But, we didn’t. By some miracle we have remained best friends.

Well, it wasn’t really a “miracle” at all. It was effort. Taking care of her brood kept her busy, so it was often up to me to call her or come over to visit. Sure, I had to give more effort than she did to our friendship, but real friends don’t keep score.

I realize that it is very important to have friends that are on the same page as me in life. I want newlywed friends and runner friends and blogger friends. But, I also realize how lucky I am to have a friend that’s on the same page as me in my heart.

If you haven’t talked to your best friend in a while, call her today. There are certain people that are just meant to walk with you through life, but it still takes work to maintain that. Good friends are worth the effort.